Food for Thought: Recalling all Facsimile Foods

Okay, the Tasti D Lite that used to be mere steps from my building is now The Lite Choice and, heads up, I’m less than pleased. The Lite Choice–talk about a misnomer. I didn’t get a choice, a say,  and certainly not a vote.

But then I’m pretty fed up with what as of now I’m calling “facsimile foods,” low calorie, low-carb, low-fat faux foods that ape the look and yes, texture of the Real Deal and yet still manage to taste like…nothing. Bio-engineered sesame seeds perched atop my crackers–where will the madness end?

Okay, I get that The Lite Choice is supposed to be not only low-fat but also organic and yes, kosher. The question for Yours Truly isn’t what they left in–but what they took out. Hint: show me the cream!

Our grandparents ate real food and though some of that fare would be dubbed a heart attack-on-a-plate by today’s standards, let me point out that Back in the Day people actually moved their bodies, climbing real stairs rather than stair masters, hefting real bales of hay rather than bench pressing Nautilus machines. And yes, when mealtime rolled around, they sat down and enjoyed their very real food. Sans apology and most importantly, sans guilt.

I’ll withhold any additional direct comments on my Lite Choice vanilla cone lest I be sued–though in that event I’d remind you that real turnips don’t bleed. Suffice it to say that Mr. Softee, my former Plan B alternative, has just moved up to the top slot otherwise known as Plan A.

Mr. Softee? From a product branding standpoint, are we sure we’re sending the right um…message?

Food for thought: eat something real and savor it.


3 thoughts on “Food for Thought: Recalling all Facsimile Foods

  1. I know, me too. I don’t have much of a sweet tooth but when I do get a hankering, I want real ice cream–and I savor it without calorie counting or apology. Ditto for cream cheese. If I’m having a bagel with cream cheese (and lox) I’m not looking for lowfat cream cheese. Give me the Real McCoy or I’d rather just skip the whole thing.

  2. OK, I officially have my soft ice cream fix, Plan C in place. Pappaya King, soft serve vanilla cone. Had it the other day. Delish. And now that it’s winter, you don’t even have to stand in line. Bonus!

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